Here are six crucial facts revealed that every man from western countries dating or marring a Chinese woman should know:
1. When dating Chinese women they rarely show their true character until after a great deal of time, sometimes not even until after marriage! This is due to a culture where the peer pressure is high. Working out her true character before-hand is therefore a must.
2. When Chinese women are attracted to a man they will do things indirectly (much more so than a western female) to show their attraction, but without knowing the cues and signs it may pass you by. One example is if she advises you to take care of your health, or when the weather is changing to wear more clothes. This is not simply a throw-away statement on her part, as it is in western culture: she is trying to show her feelings are deeper than just simply friendship.
3. A Chinese brides expectation of marriage is based on her own culture and not necessarily yours. Don’t assume that she knows what marriage is like in your country or what will be expected of her just because you’ve heard that Chinese girls are ‘traditional’. In actual fact, the more traditional they are considered in Chinese culture, the less likely they will be able to adapt to you or your country.
4. Chinese women are seldom submissive after you really get to know them. The submissive nature you may see in the beginning months (or sometimes even years) is simply a cultural affectation that may gradually disappear and be replaced by her true character, which can be anything from generous, loving and kind, to selfish, bossy and materialistic. Find out what it truly is beforehand.
5. When dating Chinese girls the etiquette is frequently over-emphasized by them where non-Chinese males are concerned, and many suddenly become ‘ultra-traditional’, whereas with a Chinese male before, they may not have been. BREAKING DOWN THIS FACADE is therefore ‘a must’, as it can cause untold complications otherwise. Until that time you should follow the accepted Chinese dating etiquette.
6. Not all Chinese brides consider love to be an important factor in their marriage choice. Culturally in China, love and marriage have only recently become linked, and it is still far from being the norm in China. If you ask a Chinese woman you are dating or considering marriage to, if she loves you, she will almost always say “yes”.
This does not however necessarily mean she is thinking of the same kind of love you are thinking of. Chinese people frequently think of the word ‘love’ as almost a verb, as in if they act loving towards you and do loving things, it is sometimes equal in their minds to love. Make sure you are both on the same wavelength first if that is important to you, and learn how to find the right one….